Holy Sh#&tout!
Someone call Matt Pinfield and Kevin Seal . . . it’s a 120 Minutes!
It was come from behind night in the MLS! [Insert your own homophobic or tasteless joke here. This is ours . . .] So, of course, Clint Mathis scored!
“He missed the net entirelyâ€
Taylor Twellman was all alone in the box, a sweet cross was headed straight for his massive noggin. Glory was going to be his for tying the game. But, he screwed it up. He sent the ball toward those dorks that dress up like colonial-era insurgents revolutionary war soldiers. I was sure the game and series were over.
I was just about to get spifflicated on some of Gertrude’s fermented cider when, Taylor cleaned-up a nifty Joe Frappuccino run and clever pass to the human wicket that is Andy Dorman. Boom! The Revs are back in it. Later, the ghost of Pat Noonan’s crippled body slotted home the series tying goal.
After watching the the Revs choke on easy headers on OT, I figure the Fire would steal the series on PKs. But, it was the Fire that choked. Now, New England waits for a possible conference final rematch with DC . . .
Cleatus!
As readers know, like North Korea, we love the bomb! And, even though we despise Cleatus, we salute his series tying goal. He bombed it passed a leaping Sala.
The shootout was even, until FC Dallas lost its mind. The hoops sent their goalkeeper to the spot for the 6th-round PK. Big mistake. His shot was saved. The Rapids smartly sent a World Cup veteran and team captain to the spot. Pablo scored (‘natch).
Fan cheered. The Altitude TV guy says “It’s like déjà vu all over again.” Doves cried. I farted and went to bed . . .
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